nomads cc

Match Report: Nomads V Brampton Bryan CC Sunday June 10th 2018

The Nomads’ second fixture of 2018 saw a foray into Proper Cricket with our inaugural 40 over match. I am delighted to tell you we were once again blessed with beautiful weather and a fantastic setting, and this time a victory.

As always with the Nomads, I’d like to start with some thanks. Thanks to Ed Williams and Mike Saunders at Brampton Bryan CC for hosting and organising, and thanks to Jack Davenport for facilitating the fixture, and of course thanks to my glorious victorious XI.

The setting for our first win of the season was new and it was quintessentially English. Brampton Bryan CC is nestled amongst trees (and nettles), overlooked by a spectacular wooden framed barn, and surrounded by rolling countryside (and nettles). The pavilion felt like a Masonic lodge but is in fact the village hall. The hospitality was peerless, including the perfect tea with all the right sandwich flavours and even scones to go with the chocolate cake. This is a club with heritage: a plaque commemorates a tour of Lahore and Peshawar (!!) and several of the more senior BBCC players were sporting caps and jumpers marking a tour of Sooth Africa, which I was to learn included playing at Newlands and Port Elizabeth. Overseas tours, playing on test grounds…Oh Nomads, your skipper was inspired…So thank you Brampton Bryan CC, it was a privilege to grace your turf.

So on to the action.

By mutual agreement we batted first. I’d talked up our batting line up you see.

As this was Proper Cricket I broke with tradition and sent in my 2 best batsmen to open and dropped myself down the order (to a more talent proportionate #6): Barney Smith and Charlie Minogue took to the crease, looking like they meant business. This meant I could umpire, and with typical generosity Robbie Underhill volunteered to join me in the baking sunshine. Charlie started with 2 forward defences straight out of a Geoffrey Boycott wet dream and then took a single from what looked like a decent BBCC opening bowler. There then followed what must be one of the worst things that can happen to you playing this kind of cricket. It was horrible. It was painful to watch. Here it is. It’s the 4th ball of the opening over. You are umpiring. Your mate takes guard for his first ball at the other end. He’s reliably good. The bowler’s arm fizzes past your left ear, your mate goes back to a straight one, the ball stays low, slips under his bat and hits him 6 inches above the ground 6 inches in front of middle stump. The bowler goes up like Shane Warne on crystal meth, all 10 of his team mates join in, the appeal echoes around the ground and all eyes are on you. He is out. You know he is out. The bowler definitely knows he is out. LBW? 1st ball? Sunday cricket? Yep. You have to give it. Sorry Robbie, Sorry Barney, I still don’t know which of you felt more pain, but we were 1 for 1.

However at drinks we were 50 odd for 1. That’s drinks at 15 overs. Proper Cricket. A partnership between our first Number 3 in a team of Number 3’s, Matt Pugh and the calm and collected Charlie Minogue who was on 36, and well deserving of his luke warm orange squash. We’d seen some steady accumulation from this pair, and some solid defence against some excellent bowling from a youthful L Clarke (Hereford County CC jumper on) and J Corfield who had served Barney his Golden Duck (did I mention it was his first ball?). Charlie’s 36 included a huge 6 into the nettles over Cow Corner, and both Pugh and Minogue looked well set against a first change of bowling that looked amenable and were finding the boundary / nettles with regularity…but sadly drinks did their trick and Matt fell to decent catch as he looked to push the score on – and triggered a bit of a middle order collapse that included brief but colourful contributions from debutant Kev Willis (12) and John T (10) and me holing out the the oppo’s skipper for 1. Yes, another ONE. We were treated to a feast of run scoring from the ever-reliable Robbie Underhill (clearly over the trauma of raising his finger on a buddy’s first ball) and another debutant Mark Willis (yes relation!). Robbie’s 24 featured 5 fours and Mark’s 35 featured 6 before he fell to a quite spectacular catch on the boundary by the afore-mentioned youthful L Clarke with a Hereford County CC jumper on. Minogue remained throughout, and was to fall to the obligatory fireman’s seemingly pedestrian middle pace for a glorious 80. Yes, EIGHTY!! (including 2 sixes and 10 fours. An ovation, please fellow Nomads, for Charlie, even if he is AKA The Oppo. And with Charlie’s fall that really was that. Our tail did not wag and we were all out for 193 in the 33rd over.

The aforementioned perfectly formed tea followed, and then it was our turn to bowl.

It seems there is no equivalent of ‘taking a yard off for the youngsters’ when it comes to batting, because the BBCC openers went after Guy Bicker Caarton with relish, and it has to be said also plundered 20 runs from Rob Skyrme’s opening 3 overs – they were 50 for 0 before you could say “have I been hustled again?”. Fortunately the first change bowlers made the breakthrough with Robbie (I think) breaking the opening partnership and JT sending their number 3 back to the lodge pavilion for a duck. Kev Willis was to remove their equivalent of C Minogue, a L Whitbread, for a worrying 57, but our struggles wre not over. A middle order partnership between The Big Fireman and The Oppo Skipper (worth exactly 50) and a most impressive 21 from Master Clarke meant we went into the last over with 163 on the board –20 runs needed, the last 2 at the crease, and most worryingly for the Nomads’ prospects, the ball was in my hand. And so the final over started with the Nomads on their toes and a hushed silence over the crowd and the nettles. And I bowled him first ball. Not Master Clarke, but Mr Hutschings, a veteran of tours of South Africa and Pakistan, gracer of international rtest grounds (and very much a tail ender). It was over. We had won, and another glorious day of cricket was over.

I am not going to award any Men of the Match or champagne moments – we are all Men of the Match and in my never humble opinion I’d say the whole day was one long champagne moment. I very much hope Brampton Bryan will have us back next year, and that we were as much fun to play against as they were – which is what its all about Thanks again to all of them, but especially Ed Williams, Mike Saunders at Brampton Bryan CC and again to Jack Davenport.

And thanks to all of you that played for playing.

Over and out

Match Report: Nomads CC v Moor Park Laetificators, May 18th 2018, Moor Park

Here follows the first match report of the Nomads’ 2018 season, and I am sad to say we have started with a loss. This year the Moor Park Laetificators were just too strong for us, and they have avenged their defeat of last year. It’s one all.

Before I tell you the sorry tale of our defeat I would like to say a huge thank you to Charlie Minogue and the school for allowing us to play on the pitches lovingly prepared for the children to play on. We are blessed by being able to play in such beautiful settings as Downton Hall and Moor Park, and we should collectively pinch ourselves to remind ourselves how lucky we are.

So, to the action.

I won the toss and elected to bat, and for me personally it went downhill from there. I triggered a top order collapse by calling for a suicidal single and running myself out. In fact I fell over, so I didn’t even manage to run myself out. It was abject.

This clearly ruffled Barnaby Smith, but he outlasted the explosive Rupert Hunt at no 3, but not by much. We were 3 wickets down with less than 20 on the board and Charlie Minogue, the Laetificators’ skipper, hadn’t even arrived yet! A leader with faith in his team, and it was well placed. Will Corbett and Hal Stoney set the tone and opened the bowling in style, with Master Stoney clean bowling R Hunt (who I now know skippered and scored a century for Abberley – Master Stoney will be no doubt pleased to know) swiftly followed by Master Corbett claiming wicket #3, the scalp of the notoriously difficult to remove B Smith. Full Nomads respect goes to you both: the future of English cricket is in your hands.

A diligent stand between Joe Miller and Robbie Underhill steadied the ship, with Robbie eventually top scoring with 34. Joe Miller was forced to call for a helmet after the Laetificators’ skipper had announced his arrival by bowling his 6 foot tall exocet flinging Kiwi ringer Dowle* out of the sinking sun. But Joe is made of tougher stuff, and saw him off. Meanwhile at the other end Robbie accumulated, with some glorious drives and cuts through point, breaching the boundary no less than 7 times. Sadly Joe was to fall to a combination of the wily bowling of David Newell and the safe hands of the (semi-professional) sports master Mr Martin, who I’m afraid to say also bowled our hero (and Man of the Match**) Robbie Underhill.

Some feisty hitting from Charlie Richards and Jules Barratt (FOUR sixes in his 25 runs) boosted our score to an almost respectable level, but a big total still looked some way off as our last recognised batsman James Shaw followed me, Smith, Hunt, Miller and Richards into the scorebook with single figures, and our tail took to the crease with several overs to go. Tim Hughes and George Piper resisted the Laetificators stalwartly, adding 4 precious runs to the score and allowing me a brief return to the crease to triple my first tally…and then run the magnificent Tim Hughes out to bring up the 10th wicket. This is not what the skipper is supposed to do.

Our total was a mere 114.

Tea was taken. Thanks to the WAGs for providing the sustenance, and to Charlie Minogue for providing the beer. All was forgiven. Temporarily.

The Laetificators innings started with more guile from the skipper, and those pesky kids again, this time opening the batting. We were politely asked to refrain from bowling our not so secret weapon George ‘The Bomber’ Piper at the younger generation, which I willingly complied with, and asked Robbie to take a yard off. Here’s what it says next to Will Corbett in the scorebook: 4.1.4.4.1. Robbie was having no more of that, so put that yard back on to remove Master Corbett, and Joe Miller did the right thing and sent Master Stoney back to the pavilion before any further humiliation could be meted out. Youth then gave way to experience and we were all treated to some truly sublime batting from David Newell and Jack Davenport. They saw off George on his outdoor debut, who bowled superbly for no wickets; they defended the good balls diligently and punished the bad balls mercilessly; they even ran well (if not that fast) between the wickets. It was really annoying. Fortunately David was superbly bowled by Rupert Hunt for 27, and then Jack retired, a true gentleman not only because he made way for his team mates, but also because he retired one run short of Robbie’s 34, thereby allowing us to at least high score. Well played Jack.

And in came The Sports Teachers, and I could hear Mr Minogue cracking a bottle of Gold from the boundary, confident in the knowledge his services would not be required. And they weren’t. Miss Sewell was cruelly bowled by Charlie Richards for 1, but hey, we needed something to celebrate by this stage. And then the scorebook says it all…

Harry: 1.6.1.4.1

Martin 6.6.4.

An explosive display of skill, talent, timing and technique. Which is just as well when you think about it…

And that was that.

But my word it was a wonderful evening and if you weren’t there you really should have been. The sun shone and the kids played and the banter flowed. It was cricket as it should be, and as David Newell so rightly called it, Cricket was the Winner. And we raised some money for cricket at the school: £280 from the Nomads, an as yet undisclosed sum from the Laetificators, THANK YOU everyone who sponsored or just put their hands in their pockets. I will let you know the final total and what it will be spent on in due course.

So, well played the Laetificators, thank you to the groundsmen, thank you to Charlie Minogue and the school, and thank you to the Nomads who played, especially Tim Hughes who stepped in at the 11th hour to make us XI.

On to the next one!

*no Christian name in the scorebook

**there is no Laetificators Man of the Match. There are two Boys of the Match. Well done you two, you should be proud of the way you played.

Looks better than it was....

....this WAS better....

.....as was this....

....and this.

Master Corbett leads the way for the Laetificators ...

...followed by Mr Martin...

......it was relentless.....

...but cricket was the winner

Match report for the 6-a-side tournament at Bishops Castle Cricket Club, June 2017

The Chief Enthusiasm Officer had some challenges with amassing a side so the first thing I am duty bound to do here is a huge Nomads shout out to Kate Thompson who stepped in at the 11th hour (well 9am to be precise) and saved the day. Thank you Kate.

So we were 6. Myself, Kate and John Thompson, Rob Skyme and David and Guy Bicker-Caarten: and we looked resplendent in our Nomads shirts and whites, especially as everybody else was in anything but white…

There were 5 teams in total, and we all played each other once. 5 overs a side, with everyone except the keeper bowling one.

Our first game was against the fire service who set us a decent total depsite the day’s first Champagne Moment, an unplayable inswinging jaffa from David Bicker-Caarten, that took the off stump of a distinctly agriculural fireman. Sadly our batting didn’t quite get us there…

There followed some (very good) beer and burgers that David managed to describe as ‘great’ (but which I saw arrive in one of those cardboard boxes shrink wrapped in plastic…). There also followed 2 more defeats, I’m afraid, against the rugby club and then the Castle Pub. We batted first in both games and despite some feisty hitting from Guy Bicker-Caarten and John Thompson, both times we failed to put on a decent score, and the opposition chased down our meagre totals with ease.

But the Nomads are not a side to grow accustomed to defeat, and having won the toss we took the field to bowl at the Kings Head with steel in our eyes and fire in our belly. Wickets from Rob Skyme and John Thompson, and miserly bowling from the Bicker-Caarten pair kept them to an achievable target of 48 (I think…). Out strode our opening pair, Rob Skyme and Kate Thompson, and out they stayed.
Let me tell you it was like watching Alistair Cook and Ben Stokes. Kate at one end, resolute in defence, stealing the odd single and refusing to budge, despite dubious appeals for caught behind (nowhere near the glove!). And at the other, there he was: tall, blonde, dashing, his willow slicing the air like a light sabre and that nasty pink ball (yes, pink!) was flying to all corners of the ground. An unbeaten opening stand to take the 4th game, saving us from the wooden spoon and leaving us all on a high. Most definitely another Champagne Moment!

So there you have it – played 4, lost 3 won 1. But as ever, cricket was the winner.

Final and extra special thanks to Kate for saving the day.

Match report, Sunday 4th June 2017: Nomads CC V the Harp Lane Invitation XI at the wonderful Downton Hall cricket pitch.

We played 2 innings of 20 overs each - so a hybrid of test cricket and T20...and we lost.

The Harp Lane Invitation XI were just too strong for us again this year, so we are now ‘played two, lost two’ against them, I’m afraid. The victory against the MP Laetificators seems even sweeter now as we are played two, won one, lost one for the season so far…

So that’s the least important bit out of the way.

We arrived and Downton was looking resplendent. Is there a more glorious setting for The Glorious Game? If so I want a fixture. The weather, however, was looking ominous and my RainToday app foretold misery to come. But the Nomads and Harp Lane are optimistic sorts, and with no no-shows (thank you everybody) and some remarkable collective punctuality (more thanks) Robbie and I walked out to do the toss at 11.05 with 2 full sides in the pavilion - and there was no rain. I won and elected to bowl. Not sure why, really…until Rob “That’s Why I Open The Bowling” Skyme smashed Duncan “Unknown Quantity” Wollaston’s wicket for a duck - and we were OFF! Ringers came and went for single figures and from slip everything seemed rosy until a certain Rob Windsor-Clive strode to the wicket with his sleeves rolled up and absolutely smashed us all around the park for an unbeaten 51 (retired) featuring no less than ELEVEN FOURS. ELEVEN! Champagne Moment Number Two! With a little help from the Robbie and Russ show at the death, Harp lane set a slightly above par 117. And the rain stayed away.

The Nomads first innings response was led by our own alliterative partnership in the middle order, the Jack and Josh show, who, with the exception of a cruelly run out Charlie Minogue and a total boosting Marco Walker, were the only 2 to hit double figures in the face of a consistent Harp Lane attack. We finished on 102 for 8. Respectable, but not enough. Obviously.

And still the rain stayed away. Lunch followed. Sandwiches and beer were consumed, WAGs and offspring arrived...and the skies opened.

It bucketed. More beer was consumed.

At this point it is apt to pay tribute and offer thanks to whoever prepares that Downton wicket, for within 2 minutes of the rain stopping we were back out – and we did not trash the pitch (I hope…). For an uncovered track I thought it was pretty good, especially the weather we have had. If Mark will have us, we’ll be back!

So out came the Harp Lane openers, and back went the first for another duck and another Skyme scalp! Oh yes. This brought the afore mentioned Duncan “Unknown Quantity” Wollaston to the wicket, and I’m afraid the trouble started in earnest. Here’s what he looks like in the score book: 1.6.6.1.6.1.2.6.4. bowled, Minogue, 33. Thank you, Charlie, we needed that rather badly. Awesome power batting Mr Wollaston. Any chance you could stick to mud runs in the future? We were in the poop. Solid knocks from Underhill, Richards, Barratt and the irrepressible Windsor-Clive (a mere 24 with just 4 fours this time) and Cameron “What me? A Ringer?” Taylor and the Nomads were facing a daunting 160 in our second innings.

I started the charge with a 6. That’s enough said about my performance, especially as it involved running John Thomson out (sorry JT!). Charlie Minogue set about knocking off the runs but his untimely departure to a juggled catch on the boundary by that Wollaston again triggered a collapse of which our national side would be proud, with only the only score above FIVE in the next 5 wickets a dashing 24 from Marco, which saw us reach the ton… Sadly Marco was to fall to the lethal Jules “Get it Above their Eyeline” Barratt, leaving our last pair, our opening bowlers no less, Steve Burch and Rob Skyme, with a mountain of 50+ to climb…and OMG THEY VERY NEARLY DID IT! And who bowled our Rob? Yep, their Rob. That Windsor-Clive again. Our Rob scored 33, including 3 glorious sixes, but it wasn’t to be. We were done, and I think the final line in the scorebook should read:
Rob Skyme, Nomads Man of the Match, bowled, Rob Windsor-Clive, Harp Lane Man of the Match, 33.

Not that there is a man of the match or anything…

So, Champagne Moments:

John Thomson’s glorious c&b, even though it didn’t count (first baller)
Matt Pugh AND Robbie Underhill’s double wicket maidens – nice work!
Big batting from Wollaston, Windsor-Clive, Skyme and Walker – sublime timing.
Our dogged Last Stand
Dan Baker kissing the strip on his follow through
Joshua claiming a wicket with his first ball in both innings. Nice style (although I am relying on the scorebook for that one rather than memory). Nice dog training too…

Flat Prosseco Moment:
Robbie dropping me, and me returning the complement and continuing my 100% record of putting down the oppo’s skipper in the slips, even though Robbie’s edge was a first baller and a finger tips at full stretch job, it was still a chance…

That’s Bollinger when I thought it was Cava Moment:
The news that Cameron regularly bowls at Joe Root in the nets…divulged only AFTER the match, of course….

And I get the Warm Tin of Spar Lager moment for running out JT…sorry again mate!

Sledge of the Match has to be a 'blue on blue' incident, with Jules Barratt being barracked for the campness of his run up. How Charlie Richards got away without a similar slur is beyond me. Utter hypocrisy.

So there it is. I want to leave it to Robbie Underhill to sum up the day with a quote from one of the very lovely emails I have received since last night (thank you for those):“I genuinely think everyone had an absolute blast and those who hadn’t played for a while fell in love with cricket again!”

Match Report, 24th May 2017, T20 against the Moor Park Laetificators at Moor Park

It was a glorious evening with blue skies and a beautifully prepared track – a massive thank you to Charlie Minogue and the school for letting us use the first X! square, and a collective Nomad nod of respect and gratitude to the groundsman and his team. It was a pretty pristine pitch. With the trees, and the sun, and the sound of leather on willow and children playing with Moor Park itself in the background, it was the kind of setting ITV make period dramas in.

We won, I am delighted to report, with 133 for 5 proving too much for the Laetificators, despite a team that was practically semi-professional.

Champagne Moments would be Dan Baker’s athletic catch to remove a member of the fairer sex, Adam Hewlett’s bewitching spin bowling claiming 3 utterly bemused Laetificators’ wickets, Tom Gloster and Barnaby Smith’s unbeaten knocks, Rob Windsor-Clive’s miserly bowling, and Robbie Underhill removing the Laetificators Chief Ringer Glyn Harrhy in a moment of cricketing quality that had me pinching myself.

An extended Prosecco Moment would be the standard of fielding overall…no dropped dollies, and very few misfields. Some of the fielding would have been feline if there’d been less bulk to move around, and both keepers did themselves proud considering the condition they are in. I mean the conditions.

A Hang on that’s Cava Moment would be me failing to pull off a stunning catch in the slips to claim The Ultimate Wicket and remove Charlie Minogue, who remained stubbornly not out at the close. Grudging respect to him for that. Next time Mr Minogue, next time…

The Claret Moment, of course, has to go to James Duffield, who left the field having introduced the ball to his eye socket via his top edge. It was actually quite nasty and I don’t mind telling you I bought a First Aid kit as a result today. Hope you’re alright mate, and THANK YOU FOR THE MUSIC! It was inspired and brilliant and hilarious.

The Warm Tin of Spar Lager Moment would probably be Barnaby Smith running Rupert Hunt out for 5. Respect to Rupert for taking it in such good humour. Let’s not dwell on that.

Another massive THANK YOU goes out to the school for treating us all to beer and BBQ after the game.

Thank you Moor Park, and thank you Laetificators. We had a blast.

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Match Report: Nomads CC v The Harp Lane Invitation XI. Downton Hall, July 2nd 2018

Once again this iconic fixture ended in defeat for the Nomads. Which really was the only thing wrong with what was otherwise pretty much a perfect day.

Before I go any further a big thank you must go to our hosts for allowing us to use their wonderful pitch – we are, as ever, as lucky as we are grateful.

We went for the Test20 format – 2 innings of 20 overs each with lunch in between. Thanks you to the WAGs and Henry at Harp Lane for providing such a delicious repast, and thanks to Robbie for the BEER.

Beer was drink, and sandwich and pies were consumed. Brows were mopped. It was HOT, baby.

And that was that.

I am going to leave it to Henry Mackley, a co-founder of this wonderful fixture to put the result into context with these kind words he sent to Robbie and I after the game. Thank you Henry, and thanks again for the pie.

"It really was the perfect game of cricket: glorious weather, delightful company, a magical setting, and a match played a spirit that epitomises everything that is wonderful about the game."

I'm sure you'll both disagree, but I think the result was utterly incidental. In my humble opinion, we all won yesterday!

There were many champagne moments, and I invite you to send in your own, but here are some of my highlights…

The rainbow at the end of the day

David Newell’s stumping and the rejuvenating effect it had on him and anyone else over the age of 40 who saw it

Proof of the existence of BDES (Batsman Deafness to Edges Syndrome) when James ‘The Man Most Likely to Walk’ Shaw was oblivious to and edge that all of us heard the first time and some of us heard a second time as it echoed back from Clee Hill

The Harp Lane bowling attack as a unit. In the second innings especially there was a quality of bowling I frankly never expected to encounter with a Nomad shirt on, and I’m proud of the fact we were (nearly) equal to it.

Guy Bicker Caarten’s second spell of bowling. In the teeth of some brutal batting claiming the key wickets of Hugh Fitzwilliam-Lay and Jules Barratt.

JT’s swashbuckling 32

Finally, the awesome power batting and timing from Charlie ‘Flouncy Run Up’ Richards and Rupert ‘Put Some Weight Into It’ Hunt. Unstoppable.